A new dream

I don't remember if I blogged about this or not...

Back in December, something I felt God speak to me was this. That He is pouring into me a new dream.

It was a word I knew He was speaking to me. Something He was mending me with. A restoration. Something as fulfilling as rain. Pouring. A new dream. Meaning, it's ok that "old dreams" are of the past. Because there is something new.

I began to feel little by little that God was leading me in a direction somewhat unexpected.

So now I'm weeks away from graduation. I'm 20 years old. I'll have my Bachelor's degree in music, I'm single and I'm moving to Nashville in August.

A few years ago, I would have no doubt expected to say, "I'm 20 years old, (probably) graduating, engaged (or married) and about to live with my husband (if I wasn't already married), and working in a church.

That was my expectation. I planned on teaching my adorable wonderful homeschooled students. Making a living in New Jersey. Being with the people I love. And marrying a man I loved. Whoever he might have been.

But you know what? My life is completely different.

Sure, I desire a husband and a family.

But It's more like I'm open to that sometime in the future than waiting for it.

I feel for the first time (a phrase that's becoming extremely common lately) that I am more and more filled with this new dream. Flooded. Like I'm back floating really. It's comfortable. I'm at peace. Even though I don't know where the current is taking me exactly.

He is changing me. He is changing my heart, and taking me to new places. Places I do not know. Places I am unfamiliar with.

I am so encouraged right now. Taking a step of faith is so necessary. Moving forward when we're unsure is an incredible thing. He WILL meet us. He's right here... sometimes the fear and uncertainty is just overwhelming. But He is DOING a work. Sometimes we expect that He's already done it, and act like we're lacking and in the wrong, when really, He's only told us He is DOING something. It's not done yet. We're to prepare.

It's like God says, "We're going to Florida!" And we're still in Arizona. And it's the desert, not the beach. Suddenly we panic. There's no beach here! Something must be wrong.

Ahem. He said we're going. He didn't say we're there yet.

And sometimes we have more to prepare than other times.

So I guess I'm preparing still.

But it's gonna be a good time.

And for the record, I have no idea how I'm gonna get to Florida. Yet again, it's gonna be a good time.

Ok, out of the metaphor... I'm about to board my plane. Fare thee well.