Thursday, January 6, 2011

You hold everything together

I know I haven't blogged about the car accident I was in four days ago, and I don't think I can yet. But I just have to say, Vespers tonight was the first time I was in a place of corporate worship since before the accident...

It blows me away that God meets me where I am. Every time. Worship means something new to me every time I worship, because I'm always in a different place.

Tonight, the first song Center, I just loved it. I admit to being even more emotional after the accident than I normally am. It makes me frustrated that I without thinking, just breath, and when the breath comes out, so do tears. And I'm not sorry. I can't be sorry. Hearing, and singing the line "you hold everything together," in that song just pulled the tears willingly from my tired eyes tonight. Because He held me together. He held me together, from being.... just from a very different story.

He held our car together. He held us together. The people in the car. He holds everything together.

And then when we sang The Glory of It All... that got me too. Because of the whole chorus... "The glory of it all is He came here for the rescue of us all that we may live."

God impressed something on my heart after the accident. That any scars and bruises, the stains of blood on my jeans, and the nagging headaches form the bump on my head... it's all like an imprinting that He was there. That He held everything together.

To rescue us, so that we may live.

So that we'd live, even though it might not have been that way.

Like I said, every time I worship, I'm coming out of a different moment in my life. The moments I've been living lately, have been really difficult, confusing and emotional moments. I'm alive. And I just don't even know how to piece everything together.

But He holds everything together.

And He held us together in that car. And He holds me together tonight as I remember.

He is so good. He is such a good God.

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