Glazed

Last night my family went to see the new Narnia movie. It was fabulous. We grew up listening to my dad read the Narnia books to us before we went to bed. It's been exciting seeing the movies as a family. Last night we went to see Voyage of the Dawn Treader, all ten of us, in 3D.

We walked into the darkened theater, passing the box in which we'd toss our 3D glasses after the movie. As soon as the previews started, we realized it was already time to get on with stylin' the fancy glasses. After a moment of considering the fact that every single person in the theater already had the glasses on, I didn't feel to silly putting them on myself.

I'll admit, they weren't the easiest thing in the world on the stomach. Zach, sitting to my left had to take his off for a few minutes to close his eyes. I won't lie to you... the guy's got the softest stomach this side Wisconsin. Why I chose Wisconsin for this argument? I heard someone say Wisconsin in church today. It's kind of fun to say. So there, I said it.

There was a moment during the movie I decided to take my glasses off myself. It kind of hurt my head to see the 3D stuff. I'm proud to say my stomach was just fine. But my head hurt. My eyes felt strained. But I kept my eyes open, and attempted watching without the glasses.

But then I realized I couldn't even really see once I took them off. I couldn't see the screen clearly. It was rather blurry.

I decided it would probably do me the most good to just continue to wear the 3D glasses. It would have hurt even more to keep them off.

Last night when we got home, I sat down on Caleigh's bed... time and time again I realize I don't live in my own house anymore... I pulled out my Bible and read a bit, and pulled a pillow to my lap, and started writing in a journal. Writing my prayers out is one of the only ways I can keep focused when I spend time with God.

I pondered a few things... how desperately I needed God to change my heart on some things. You know the times I'm talking about... when you know perfectly well your heart is not in the right place. You know you're viewing someone with a glaze of disrespect, or judgment. Like the lenses we wear are coated with it.

Have you ever wondered how God does it? How He can look at us, through lenses coated with love, rather than disdain, disapproval and hate? Heck, it's not even like He sees through "lenses" as much as He simply sees through His eyes.

How I wish I could see through His eyes. How I wish my eyes were as clean as His.

I want to see through lenses of love. Lenses of mercy, and grace... joy, hope... I want to see that way.

Maybe I was still thinking about the 3D glasses or something when I considered all of this. It was quite a satisfying moment to toss the glasses in the recycling box when we walked out.

In the same way, seeing through lenses of love though, isn't always easy on the stomach... or the eyes. Or the head. Or the heart.

I think in fact, we might opt to simply remove the glasses, and close our eyes. It's better than the strain that comes along with viewing our surroundings through the glazed glass. It's not natural. It's confusing. It hurts.

When I took my glasses off last night, all the lines were blurry. I could figure out enough, but nothing was clear. Just a blur.

When I put them back on, it was relieving to be able to see clearly, even though the 3D-ness of it all was sometimes quite literally in my face, and less than comfortable for my eyes and head.

Isn't the love of God that way? To see through lenses of love... to see the things and people around us with a glaze of love on the glass in front of our eyes.

Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes it makes us feel sick. It's not natural. But when we remove them... everything gets blurry. And in the end we might end up even more sick than we would have been had we left the glasses on.

That's what I want... I want to see through Love, even if it hurts, and feels wrong, and makes the back of my head hurt. I want to see through them even though I might look silly in thick black frames that don't sit well on my nose, and leave marks between my eyes.

And so, the end of the story is this- the movie was great. I loved it. And I want to reread all of the books again. That said, I'm going to go on and enjoy this snowy afternoon with another book, and maybe a cup of tea.