You're 23 :)

Dear Caleb,

You're 23! How are you that 19-year-old RC with an earring and a baseball cap?

Taking engagement pictures with you last weekend was unreal. I can't believe I'm engaged to the guy I couldn't get out of my head for years.

There are moments when I look down at the ring you put on my finger, and think about all the times I was so discouraged I'd never fall in love. God blew all my dreams out of the water, and splattered them all over the wall into the most brilliant masterpiece.  I'm speechless. The way I'd always prayed I'd be. The way my parents and grandparents prayed for since before I was even born.

I couldn't imagine being with a better man. Someone who takes care of me above himself, someone who loves the Lord above me, and loves me above himself. Someone who reminds me of my Deuteronomy (click it if you're confused). I used to get sad because I always told people I wanted to marry someone like Zach and felt like I'd be disappointed in the end. I'm glad he was my brother. Not just because he set an amazing standard (which you exceeded with flying colors like as in you make the skittles double rainbows jealous...), but because he was your friend. Aka: one way ticket to getting to know this hunk-of-burning-attractiveness.  What can I say... besides quote you... "It's who ya know."

I love when you pray with me over the phone, or over skype, and when you're sitting next to me. You never let us forget our purpose, our Maker, the One who gave us a life to live together. You intercede for me. You're a Godly man, Caleb. Not just because you grew up with a Christian home, with a beautiful Christian family. You've made His heart your Home. And because of that, the heart of God will always be our Home, and the Home of our family. I know our house will serve the Lord, because you'll be the one leading it.

You wear the pants. But you let me pick them out. Which is so much fun. And even when it's not so much (recall last Saturday in H&M...), we always work out our tiffs in a way that puts me at ease. I'm always safe. I'm always loved.

I've said it before, but your parents were so right on when they named you after the Caleb in the Bible. He was a man of courage. He was a man who fought for what was his in the name of the Lord. You do that. Everyday. And you do it for me. And you help me, and love me through difficult situations, and frustrating times.

I love dancing with you. Whether it's at the Jr Sr in 2011 when we pretend we don't like each other, or under the Arch at night, while we're rearranging my apartment, or at a wedding... you might not swing dance (yet), but you're the only hand I want to take.

You are the biggest goof ball I've ever known. You had me panicking for dear life when we'd study together those many years ago. I was so terrified my obnoxious laughter at your humor would spill over into very unattractive tears of sooooo happy.  And now, I could listen to your ridiculous jokes and silly humor all the time, and still laugh just like I did behind my computer screen on the 3rd floor of the Greenville library.

I always just wanted someone to make me laugh.

And for that matter, someone to laugh at me. Thanks for that. I like thinking I'm funny, too.

You support me and my dreams above your own. It breaks me. You encourage me to pursue my dreams as hard as you pursue me... which makes me feel so incredibly loved, I can't even take it sometimes.

You paid for my piano to get tuned when I was too lazy to get it done myself. You love when I make music. You never get tired of it. You let me write song after song after song about you, and you never criticize me for how mushy I am. You let me make the words you say to me, putty in my hands to make into a new melody. And you never discourage me. When you remind me hundreds and hundreds of times that you're my biggest fan, you really mean it, and you show it.

You threw rocks at my window. You romance me in ways I never thought anyone would do. You listen to my songs I've written, and you make them come true. No one does that. You're insane. I can't believe I get to be your girl.

You provide for me. You provide me with more security than a little girl's blanket she can't let go of at night. You provide me with more love than all of Paris could compete with. You provide me with hands to hold when we're bored on a long drive. You give me peace when you remind me everything is under control when I'm definitely not. You look on me with understanding when even I know I'm making no sense.

You sing me to sleep over the phone. I'd rather hear your voice than anyone else's in the world.

You're a comforter. You speak to me in a way that puts my worries to rest, and my uncertainty to sleep.

You're the living form of the answered prayers prayed by my whole family, and your whole family. You're made by the hands of heaven. Heaven celebrates your birthday too. Today's the day when one of God's best dreams came true. I'm 100-percent-amen sure that when God made you, he stepped back to say, "This one... this one is Good." And today when He sees you, He's proud to say, "This one is mine."

I can't believe I get to say that, too. I love you Caleb Arb. Happy Birthday:)

Love Shai